Procrastination by Organization: Why Bangs Can Be Brave

Procrastination+by+Organization%3A+Why+Bangs+Can+Be+Brave

Lily Collins woos Armie Hammer with her adorable bangs in Mirror Mirror.

Sophia Bollag, Managing Editor

During the last Mirador staff meeting, when I quietly mentioned to my friend that I was going to get bangs for my next haircut, she jumped up, high-fived me, and yelled, “Wow, you have balls!”

I wasn’t so sure I agreed, but I didn’t argue.

When I got back to my computer, I sat and wondered if choosing to get a haircut was really a sign of bravery. Admittedly, choosing to have bangs is not a decision to take lightly. As someone with big blue eyes and dark hair, I, especially, run the risk of inviting comparisons between myself and Zooey Deschanel. Being compared to someone who is infamously adorable and who possesses fully five times as much hair as a normal person is never a good thing; next to her, everyone else comes up short. So thick, blunt, Deschanel-esque bangs are out. Whispy bangs, á la Keira Knightly in Atonement or Pride and Prejudice are perhaps a better option, but I’ve always secretly thought Knightly looks better without them. If she can’t make a hairstyle look like the most brilliant thing ever invented, I certainly have no business duplicating it.

It wasn’t until I saw Mirror Mirror, the recent Snow White flick, that I found the ideal style. The movie was terrible, but Lily Collins’ hair was perfect. Her bangs were retro: short and sweet and side-swept. I had to have them.

However, haircuts, like everything else that requires planning, have a tendency to be put off, especially now, when the Internet has allowed us to perfect the method of procrastination by organization. My “To Read” list on Safari currently contains no less than 12 long-form articles, silently becoming less and less timely the longer I wait to read them. The shopping carts I have going on countless online shopping sites are full of items that will have sold out by the time I remember I put them there. Pinterest, perhaps the greatest procrastination-facilitator on the Internet, is home to thousands of photos of clothes people plan to sew, food people plan to prepare, outfits people plan to copy, and hairstyles people plan to adopt. The majority of plans these Pinterest photos represent will never be carried out.

It is easy to overthink something like a haircut, especially when your computer provides you with thousands of photos for inspiration and an inviting place to organize them. Although Pinterest and Tumblr might seem like good places to get ideas, they are also the easiest places for those ideas to sit and sickly over with the pale cast of thought. Suddenly, you can take just as much time deciding on a haircut as Hamlet took deciding on a plan to avenge his father’s murder, which is depressing when you really think about it.

So I resisted the urge to make a pinboard of all possible hairstyles, or to write out a long list of options. I went ahead and scheduled my appointment quickly, so I wouldn’t be scared off by overthinking. They’re just bangs, after all.