Cooking With Spencer: Crepes Avec Dissapointment

Spencer Hardwick, Staff Writer

Junior year is easily the most stressful time period anyone will ever have to go through, short of deciding who your J-Prom date is going to be (I’m looking at you class of 2015). This accumulation of stress leads to students looking for a way to outsource their anger and emotions on inanimate objects. One way I have managed to accomplish this without getting arrested for disturbing the peace is stress eating. Stress eating is sitting down and playing six games of FIFA while you eat an entire tub of ice cream and kick yourself for not knowing the difference between jingoistic and autocratic. It’s easily my favorite part about Junior year, so today I’m gonna give you some recipes to try out on your own.

Crepes avec disappointment

A staple of the Parisian diet, crepes have been around for a very long time. But today, instead of making them the traditional way (which requires time, experience, and effort) we will be adding a slight twist to them.

Ingredients:

2 toaster waffles

1 jar of nutella

1 jar of peanut butter

3 strawberries, diced

1 toaster

1 lack of self respect

 

Directions:

Take the toaster waffles out of the box and put them into the toaster on medium heat. While you are waiting for them to cook, stare out the window and dream about how you can get out of going to school tomorrow. The more extravagant your methods the better.

Once your waffles have cooked, take them out and spend a few minutes looking at the Nutella and peanut butter and ask yourself if you’re really about to do this. Then spread way too much Nutella on the first waffle, instantly regret your meal decision, but then go through with it anyways because you lack self control. While spreading the peanut butter on the second waffle, eat the strawberries you cut up. You could’ve put them on the waffles but you’re hungry now and don’t have the mental fortitude to tell yourself no. Now that you have prepared your meal, pour yourself a glass of milk and stare at the sugar coma sitting in front of you. Eat it all in about under five minutes and wash it down with the terrifying thought of not living up to your parents expectations.

Pro Tip: This meal is best eaten at 1 am the night before a math test, or at 1 pm on a Saturday after you have overslept and missed your tutoring appointment.